AndyH Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 10. Tell em that for a living you disaggregate component plans, impute permitted disparity, and normalize most valuable accrual rates. Need more please quick! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david rigby Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 jessicarae.tripod.com/humor/jury.html I'm a retirement actuary. Nothing about my comments is intended or should be construed as investment, tax, legal or accounting advice. Occasionally, but not all the time, it might be reasonable to interpret my comments as actuarial or consulting advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyH Posted December 9, 2004 Author Share Posted December 9, 2004 Great. Thanks. More welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FundeK Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 9. Tell them that you LOVE your job (as described in #10) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
E as in ERISA Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 In response to one attorney, sit there with your arms crossed, pick the lint off your clothes, study your fingernails intensely. In response to the other attorney, lean over listening intently to evry word being said. If the first attorney is paying attention, he will cross you off the list. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Appleby Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 So very funny Life and Death Planning for Retirement Benefits by Natalie B. Choatehttps://www.ataxplan.com/life-and-death-planning-for-retirement-benefits/ www.DeniseAppleby.com  Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TrustMe401k Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 I just always tell the attorney that the defendant must have done something wrong or they wouldn't have arrested him in the first place. Or my dad's favorite" Thirty days in the electirc chair!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belgarath Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 Tell them you're a lawyer AND an insurance salesman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
david rigby Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 Our intrepid webmaster went thru this: http://benefitslink.com/boards/index.php?showtopic=16859 I'm a retirement actuary. Nothing about my comments is intended or should be construed as investment, tax, legal or accounting advice. Occasionally, but not all the time, it might be reasonable to interpret my comments as actuarial or consulting advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Roman Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 Say you're an expert witness actuary working mostly for the defense and your clients have never paid more than $1,000 to the plaintiff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Poje Posted December 10, 2004 Share Posted December 10, 2004 I have gotten a summons every other year for the last 8 years, so stop your griping! Had to serve once, once was over the 4th of July so no cases that week. Once my 'number' was large enough that I didn't have to serve. The remaining time almost got on another jury. now for the humor, a true story, which beats anything. before getting selected people try to use all types of excuses to get out of serving. A man approached the judge and argued he shouldn't serve because he was owner of a landscaping service and he had a big job that started on Wednesday. The judge calmly told him, no, he still had to go through the process, just make sure he made it known that he needed a short term case. there were planty of cases that should only take a day or two. well, the guy grumbled a bit and turned and walked away. suddenly the judge called out 'sir' and the guy turned around. the judge continued "I just noticed you are not properly dressed" The guy had on shorts and some type of colored t-shirt. The judge asked the baliff if there was a dress code, and yes indeed, plainly printed on the back of the summons. So, the judge told the guy, you didn't want to serve, so you definitely will not be serving. However, I tell you what. You go home and change into some proper clothes. then come back and sit outside my office. And if, if I have some time in my busy schedule we will talk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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