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If the documented and court-approved terms of your divorce included your right to some portion of your former husband's retirement benefit, and nothing has changed since (your remarriage is not a change unless the terms of the divorce provided for remarriage to change matters), then you still have that right. In order to get the benefit as a matter of right from the plan itself, then you must have a court issue a domestic relations order that satisfies certain legal requirements and submit the order to the plan administrator. If the order satisfies the requirements, the plan should determine that the order is a "qualified domestic relations order" -- a QDRO -- and should pay you benefits directly. Among the requirements for qualification are a description of the benefit awarded to you in your divorce. The plan is required to have written administrative procedures for how it processes domestic relations orders and how it determines if an order qualifies. You are entitled to get a copy without charge upon request to the plan administrator, and you or your lawyer should do that. Obtaining a domestic relations order that will qualify involves a legal proceeding, preferably in the court that handled your divorce, and the qualification requirements for a pension plan are baffling to some people, including many lawyers. It would be best to have the assistance of a lawyer with experience with QDROs. There is a remote possibility that the extreme delay in obtaining a QDRO will compromise your rights under applicable state law. Also, if your former husband retires or dies before you obtain a QDRO, your rights will be negatively affected.. Do not delay another moment. This is getting a bit technical. but submitting your divorce decree with the plan will protect your rights in certain ways while you go about preparing the QDRO document. Submitting your divorce decree to the plan will not get you any rights to benefits. Be prepared for the plan to be stupid and unhelpful, but that is not always the case.