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I don't think waiving your right to be a beneficiary has anything to do with spousal consent to a distribution. I think the spouse needs to consent to the distribution, unless the employee is deceased.

As to your original question, FWIW the IRS has an FAQ here that includes the following: "If you’ve made contributions to a 401(k) plan based on a shareholder’s S corporation’s distributions, find out how you can correct this mistake."

Don't confuse "when a match is contributed" with "when a match is calculated." You can have a match that is calculated on a payroll basis, but they are deposited after year end. It doesn't happen often, but I have seen it. (Likewise, I seen annual matches deposited each week with the deferrals.) The only match that must be deposited during the plan year is when you have a Safe Harbor Match that is calculated on a payroll basis. Then, the match must be put into the no later than the end of the quarter following the deferrals. Having a true-up on a match that is calculated on a payroll basis is silly.

I am late to this party, but I agree. There are no "rules" concerning how much is matched during the year. A plan could contribute the entire match at year end (if the document language so provided) so anything contributed during the year is gratis, so to speak. As your discussion illustrates, I find that a permitted true up usually occurs when the payroll is uneven (bonuses, etc) or when a high paid person is intent on getting the limit in the funds as quickly as possible. I suggest trying to be clear in the enrollment materials or even adding a sentence or two to the SPD clarifying when the match is contributed and whether or not a true up will occur. It is usually someone "high up" in a client company who gets "pinched" by a "no true up" rule and then they make everyone sorry that additional clarification was not provided.